Episode 123: Performative Inclusion: Token Women in Narcissistic Leadership
Elevated for visibility, blamed for everything: how narcissists weaponize your success
You were chosen for the leadership role. Promoted. Trusted. Finally recognized for your competence. So why does it feel like you’re being set up to fail?
Performative inclusion looks like fairness on the surface. It feels like progress, recognition, and opportunity. But if you’re the only woman in the room, or one of very few, and you’ve noticed that your visibility comes with a target on your back, you’re experiencing something much more calculated than you might realize.
In narcissistic families and relationships, elevating women to leadership positions isn’t about honoring their abilities—it’s a sophisticated control tactic. These roles come with all the responsibility and blame, but none of the actual power or support. You get the title while absorbing criticism meant for the entire group. You’re set up to manage impossible situations and then criticized for predictable outcomes.
And here’s the cruelest part: when you point out that the position is impossible, they remind you that they chose you. As if that choice was about your value instead of their need for a perfect scapegoat.
• Why being “chosen” for a leadership role might actually mean you’ve been positioned for maximum control and blame
• The psychological manipulation hidden in praise: how narcissists weaponize your competence against you
• The impossible math of performative inclusion: responsibility without power, visibility without actual authority
• What real inclusion would actually look like—and how to recognize when you’re being exploited instead
If you’ve ever succeeded in a leadership position only to realize you were set up to fail, or if your visibility in your family or relationship has made you a target rather than truly valued—this episode reveals the patterns you’ve been living with and what they really mean about where the actual problem lies.
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Narcissistic Abuse Recovery PODCAST – Empowering You!
Covert Manipulation | Systemic Gaslighting | Cultural Conditioning | Untangling Toxic Patterns
For Scapegoats | Dismantling Patriarchy | Gender Roles | Emotional Labor
Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Podcast
Validate. Rebuild. Revolutionize. (and Patriarchy Deconstruction)
Discover a safe haven and a wellspring of insight with the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Podcast (formerly Moving Forward with Hope – Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Podcast). In this candid, thought-provoking current series, host Lynn—personal survivor, author, and passionate recovery advocate—guides you through the landscape of toxic relationships and the covert dynamics of narcissistic abuse. With honesty, depth, and a healthy dose of tough love, Lynn helps you recognize the subtle tactics of manipulation and offers practical strategies to heal, rebuild, and reclaim your power.
Episodes dive deep into the complexities of narcissistic family systems, exploring roles like scapegoat and golden child, and shedding light on the pain of ostracization and family rejection. If you’ve been the family scapegoat—blamed, dismissed, and cast aside—this podcast validates your experience and provides a roadmap for breaking free from toxic family patterns. We tackle topics like going no contact, setting boundaries, understanding scapegoat dynamics, healing from family trauma, and uncovering covert manipulation that keeps you from thriving. Our conversations go beyond personal trauma to examine how narcissism is woven into broader cultural systems, including patriarchy’s influence on gender roles and equality.
