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5 Reasons Not to Engage with a Narcissist: They Don't Care What You Have to Say
If you have been in a relationship with a narcissist, you may have discovered it may be one of the most frustrating and confusing relationships to ever be in. As I have said in other posts, they are completely different from a ‘normal’ relationship. Everything is backwards and is meant to extract from you your lifeforce so another human has the ability to get through their day using you as narcissistic supply.
Run if you are in one, go no contact. Read the Beginner’s No Contact Guide Here.
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Table of Contents
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Are you Emotionally Exhausted from the Narcissist in Your Life?
If you have a narcissist in your life, I would not be surprised if you were at a point of emotional exhaustion. Narcissist are energy suckers/vampires and if there is any valuable tool inside of you, to which they will feel entitled to receive, they will manipulate you in clever ways so that your talents will benefit them. They are crafty people and their intentions are never for you.
Today, in this article, we are going to talk about why it’s essential to NOT engage with the narcissists antics and to cut them off cold turkey once you discover you have one lurking around you seeking you as their source of supply.
If you have been with a narcissist for an extended period of time, go up top and drill down by category, as there is a lot of information packed into each of the articles we have on our site.
Watch this video here if you are exhausted and mentally drained from being in a relationship with a narcissist.
Listen to the Podcast Episode
Narcissists are Actors that Do Not Truly Care about You
There is going to be some hard truth in this article. Some of you need to hear it and while it may be a direct article, know we have your best interest at heart.
Narcissists are destroyers of not only authentic relationships but the impact carries deep into the subconscious the longer they linger around in your life. You start to question yourself, you start to lose confidence…the list is long but that’s another article. Go Here for the article!
Dealing with a narcissist can be a challenging and emotionally draining experience. Narcissism is a personality disorder characterized by an excessive sense of self-importance, a deep need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others.
When engaging with a narcissist, it becomes evident that they do not genuinely care about what you have to say, as their focus is primarily on themselves and their own needs.
Let's Break this Down
When we say that a narcissist does not care what you have to say, unless it’s edifying them for example, we are going to break down why this is exactly.
Have you ever met someone who was so self-obsessed they never asked you a real genuine authentic question about yourself? You have come the right article to help you decipher what is really going on…
They Don't Ask, Because They Don't Care
How can it be that they don’t care? How can they be so cold? Is this really possible?
In our book, Master Manipulators, we go in the brain scans of a narcissist, the part of the brain where empathy is…it’s very interesting and I won’t share it here but pick up a copy of the book or audio version and discover it.
Why It's Futile to Engage with a Narcissist
Lack of Empathy
A narcissist does not care what you have to say because they lack true empathy.
They just don’t have it.
Like none. Zilch. Nada.
So it’s not that they don’t want to hear things from your side or perspective. It’s that they physically cannot. They don’t have empathy.
So, they cannot empathize with you, it’s a hard stop.
So what happens as a result of no empathy?
Since they cannot place value in it, they will not pay attention to your needs, will not have the ability to see how some things affect you, and will not be able to understand your feelings, perspectives, or understand when you speak and share from the heart.
Lack of empathy is a relationship huge red flag.
A true relationship does their best to understand and be supportive and uplifting to one another.
When in a relationship with a narcissist, the narcissist will belittle, dismiss your thoughts (because they do not see them as important as their own thoughts), and you will be neglected emotionally. This is one reason why you don’t want to engage with a narcissist.
Need for Validation
Narcissists constantly seek validation and praise from others to maintain their inflated self-image. When engaging with them, they may only respond positively to conversations that reinforce their self-worth or feed their ego. Anything that challenges or contradicts their perception of themselves is often ignored or dismissed.
Conversation Dominance
Narcissists tend to dominate conversations, steering the discussion back to themselves and their achievements. They may interrupt or talk over others, making it difficult for anyone else to express their thoughts or opinions. As a result, your attempts to communicate may be drowned out or belittled.
Manipulation and Gaslighting
Narcissists are skilled manipulators who may use various tactics to control the narrative and undermine your confidence. They may twist your words, deny previous statements, or gaslight you to make you doubt your own memory and judgment, making it even harder to engage in meaningful dialogue.
Lack of Genuine interest
Despite appearances, a narcissist’s interest in others is usually superficial and conditional. They may ask about your life, but it’s often to find opportunities to redirect the conversation back to themselves. Their primary concern is self-centered, and they are unlikely to reciprocate true interest in your thoughts or experiences.
Emotional Manipulation
Engaging with a narcissist can lead to emotional manipulation, as they may use guilt, blame, or even aggression to keep control of the situation. This can leave you feeling emotionally drained and frustrated.
Inability to Change
It’s essential to understand that narcissism is a complex personality disorder that is difficult to treat. Most narcissists are resistant to recognizing their behavior as problematic or seeking help, making it unlikely that they will change their approach to communication or interpersonal relationships.
If you run into someone what you have a gut intuition on these items, do not engage. A narcissist is clever, and will try to prevent these from being seen by you. This is why they are manipulative, they will try to distract you away from what they don’t want you to see, and on to what they do want to you see – it’s a game of deep psychological manipulation.
Run, run for the hills.
Have you been in a relationship with a narcissist? Drop a comment and share your experience!
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