The Importance of Creating a Safe Spot For Your Own Personal Sanity as You Recover from Trauma and Narcissistic Abuse: 8 Reasons Why
Creating a Safe Place
If you have gone through narcissistic abuse and have faced a level of trauma from it, you may start to feel as if the world is no longer a safe place. There may have been people in your life who you once trusted, confided in, and who you believe were for you, only to learn they were not, and it was all a game.
It may take time to process and think about all you have been through, the trauma, the gaslighting, the lies, and one of the best places to do this is to create a safe place.
Talk Therapy Has It's Place
Now I am an advocate of talking through things with a trusted coach, therapist our counselor, but I do not believe it is the only way to a clear head, and to recover from the trauma you have been through.
Education and learning about narcissistic traits, tactics, their mindset is all helpful but the path is really an introspective path where you discover down to the depths of who you are, what you have endured, and can safely come to terms with it with an understanding of how you came to it, why you may have been drawn or allow certain circumstances.
Now I want to tread lightly here because one of the things that did not sit right was when I visited a counselor back in 2016.
I was told it was my fault, but, abuse is not my fault – ever. I cannot control another human. I am not responsible for the actions of another. So, I largely disagreed with her and did not go back.
Narcissistic Abuse Recovery is a Specialty
Side Note: Trying to find a counselor or therapist that truly understands narcissistic abuse can be challenging. I had to go to several, and at that time, I was reading so much information, I felt I knew more than they did.
I humbly say that, but narcissistic abuse trauma is a specialty and not every counselor is adept in handling it to the level you may need. They may have general information but it’s a very unique and comprehensive experience to go through it.
At some point I would like to put together more information in a format that would be helpful for my audience to go through the healing and recovery stages and provide in depth information that I believe is left out of a lot of circles – a project for the future.
Protect Your Mental Health
Your Mental Health is worth putting a guard around it, to protect it.
It took me a long while to recover, it set me back years.
My body went haywire.
I didn’t have a strong support system.
I learned a lot about myself during the time.
I learned what I can handle, what I am capable of, and what I will allow going forward.
Now, it’s a work in progress, but I have come a long way and my mental health is a priority to me, as it should be, and I want today to talk about creating a safe place where you can be you.
A place where you can let go, allow your nervous system to regulate, to allow your body and mind to relax, decompress, focus on your breathing, tension in your body and allow for a time for mental relaxation, mental rest, and receive deep healing, peace in your soul and a place where you can let go. A place where you can be unbothered, without distractions and focus on your healing for a time.
Creating and having a safe space to process emotions after recovering from narcissistic abuse trauma is of utmost importance for healing and rebuilding one’s life.
Narcissistic abuse can be a profoundly traumatic experience, leaving emotional scars that may linger long after the abusive relationship has ended. In such situations, having a safe space becomes crucial for several reasons:
Validation and Empowerment: Narcissistic abuse often involves manipulation, gaslighting, and invalidation of the victim’s emotions and experiences. Having a safe space, such as therapy, support groups, or confiding in trusted friends or family members, allows survivors to receive validation for their feelings and experiences. This validation is essential for rebuilding self-esteem, confidence, and a sense of self-worth that may have been eroded during the abusive relationship.
Emotional Processing: After enduring narcissistic abuse, survivors often grapple with a range of complex and overwhelming emotions, such as fear, anger, guilt, shame, and confusion. A safe space provides an environment where these emotions can be acknowledged, explored, and processed without judgment. This emotional processing is crucial for releasing pent-up feelings and achieving emotional healing.
Rebuilding Trust: Narcissistic abuse can lead to a profound sense of betrayal and a loss of trust in oneself and others. Engaging with a safe space allows survivors to gradually rebuild their trust in others and in their own judgment. Therapists and support groups can play a vital role in providing a safe and non-judgmental atmosphere where trust can be rebuilt over time.
Learning Healthy Coping Mechanisms: Narcissistic abuse survivors may have developed coping mechanisms during the abusive relationship that were unhealthy or harmful. In a safe space, they can learn and practice healthier coping strategies that promote emotional well-being and resilience.
Gaining Perspective and Insight: Talking about one’s experiences in a safe and supportive environment can provide survivors with valuable insights into the dynamics of narcissistic abuse. It allows them to gain perspective on the manipulation and control they endured and helps them recognize patterns of abuse, which can be instrumental in preventing future abusive relationships.
Avoiding Isolation: Narcissistic abusers often isolate their victims from support systems, making them feel alone and dependent on the abuser. A safe space helps survivors reconnect with supportive individuals, fostering a sense of belonging and breaking the isolation imposed during the abusive relationship.
Preventing Revictimization: Without proper healing and support, survivors of narcissistic abuse may inadvertently find themselves in similar abusive situations in the future. A safe space provides an opportunity to address unresolved trauma and develop healthy boundaries, reducing the likelihood of falling into another abusive relationship.
Empowering Personal Growth: Working through the aftermath of narcissistic abuse in a safe space can lead to profound personal growth. Survivors can gain a deeper understanding of themselves, their needs, and their strengths. As they heal and rebuild their lives, they may discover new passions, goals, and aspirations.
Personal Growth is the Biggest Journey
The journey of recovering from narcissistic abuse trauma and finding a safe space for emotional healing opens the door to profound personal growth. As survivors navigate the intricate path of healing, they embark on a transformative process that touches every facet of their being. This process of personal growth is an essential and empowering aspect of the recovery journey.
Self-Discovery: One of the most remarkable aspects of personal growth after narcissistic abuse is the opportunity for self-discovery. As survivors begin to unravel the layers of trauma and heal the wounds inflicted by the abuser, they gain a deeper understanding of who they truly are. This newfound self-awareness enables them to connect with their authentic selves, uncover their passions, and identify their values and aspirations that may have been overshadowed during the abusive relationship.
Boundaries and Empowerment: Narcissistic abuse often erodes a survivor’s sense of autonomy and personal agency. Engaging in a safe space empowers survivors to establish and reinforce healthy boundaries. As they learn to assert their needs and preferences, survivors regain a sense of control over their lives. This newfound empowerment serves as a foundation for building healthier relationships and making choices that align with their well-being.
Emotional Resilience: Personal growth involves developing emotional resilience, which is particularly vital for those recovering from narcissistic abuse. Survivors learn to navigate the ups and downs of their healing journey while developing coping skills to manage triggers and setbacks. Over time, this resilience helps them bounce back from adversity, manage stress, and maintain a positive outlook on life.
Creating a safe space for yourself to feel the emotions, the trauma you have been though is an essential and often overlooked part of the healing journey. My heart is with you as you venture down the healing journey and I wish you peace in your heart as you dive in.
XO
Lynn